Because my three daughters all live out of state, I alternate between feeling lonely and feeling guilty.

What is without periods of rest will not endure ~~ Ovid

What is without periods of rest will not endure ~~ Ovid
Originally uploaded by ~Mary~~

New years feel clean. I like that.
That's all I've got to say about that right now

2011 Book List

• Martin and Osa ~ Kelly Enright

• Opportunities: Jamie Leith in Dairien ~ Ian Hall
• The Bean Trees ~ Barbara Kingsolver
• Shanghai Girls ~ Lisa See
• The Poisonwood Bible ~ Barbara Kingsolver
• Water For Elephants ~ Sara Gruen
• Shoot the Moon ~ Billie Letts
• Daisy Fay and the Miracle Man ~ Fannie Flagg
• The 8th Confession ~ James Patterson & Maxine Paetro
• The Kitchen God's Wife ~ Amy Tan
• The World Below ~ Sue Miller
• 10th Anniversary ~ James Patterson w/ Maxine Paetro
• The Miracle of Mercy Land ~ River Jordan
• Intrepreter of Maladies ~ Jhumpa Lahiri
• Shepherd's Abiding ~ Jan Karon
• Vampire Academy ~ Richelle Mead
• The Christmas Cookie Club ~ Ann Pearlman
• Private ~ James Patterson & Maxine Paetro
• When You Are Engulfed in Flames ~ David Sedaris
• Black & White ~ Dani Shapiro
• Pawley's Island ~ Dorthea Benton Frank
• Fried Green Tomatoes at the Whistle Stop Cafe ~ Fannie Flagg
• The Book of Lost Things ~ John Connolly
• Don't Blink ~ James Patterson & Howard Roughan
• Light From Heaven ~ Jan Karon
• Consider the Lobster (and other essays) ~ David Foster Wallace
• Once in a Promised Land ~ Laila Halaby (book club)
• Snow Flower and the Secret Fan ~ Lisa See
• Stuart a life backwards ~ Alexander Masters
• In This Mountain ~ Jan Karon
• Worst Case ~ James Patterson & Michael Ledwidge
• The Art of Racing in the Rain ~ Garth Stein
• Unaccustomed Earth ~ Jhumpa Lahiri
• Lost and Found ~ Carolyn Parkhurst
• A Common Life ~ Jan Karon
• The Reader ~ Bernhard Schlink
• Blindness ~ José Saramago
• A New Song ~ Jan Karon
• We Need to Talk About Kevin~ Lionel Shriver (book club)
• Out to Canaan ~ Jan Karon
• The Girl Who Played With Fire ~ Stieg Larsson
• A Thousand Splendid Suns ~~ Khaled Hosseini (read it again for book club)
• These High Green Hills ~~ Jan Karon
• Life if Pi ~~ Yann Martel
• Moloka'i ~~ Alan Brennert
• The Story of My Life An Afghan girl on the other side of the sky ~~ Farah Ahmedi w/ Tamim Ansary
• A Light in the Window ~~ Jan Karon
• I Alex Cross ~~James Patterson
• Alex Cross's Trial ~~ James Patterson & Richard Dilallo
• The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy ~~Douglas Adams
• The Four Agreements ~ Don Miguel ( sadly I did not finish this book. It was too weird for my taste)
• Chocolat ~ Joanne Harris
• At Home in Mitford ~~ Jan Karon
• A Wrinkle in Time ~~ Madeleine L'Engle

cat's got my tongue

One would think that a woman of a "certain age" ( or more ) such as myself, would have one thing or another to write about here.
Not the case.

I guess I'm speechless

ch-ch-ch changes

I need to make more changes.
Seems as though I have done more modifying of self in my middle years than at any other time in my life.

I am so not into feeling betrayed by those I am attempting to help any longer.
My union steward days are numbered. I was such a damn Polly Anna. It's nuts.
Why on earth I thought I could make a difference in a segment of the world that is over-run with political maneuvering and back-stabbing, is beyond me.
What the hell was I thinking?

So now, I begin to move on. I probably will lose some "friend ships", which makes me feel sad. But I will probably gain peacefulness and lose a major batch of life wrecking anxiety.

Like I've said for many moons, " I am a great supporter. I am not a great leader"
nor do I want to be.

"I yam what I yam" as the great philosopher Popeye once said.

it's puzzling

I read a lot. Books, magazines, Internet ....
and I believe that I see a disturbing trend.
People are becoming more and more judgmental.

In this enlightened / post hippy / everybody thinks they're so damn intellectual age -people are becoming more judgmental.
of other people not less.
I find this disconcerting to say the least.

And some of these people , if you accused them of being judgmental , they would
vehemently deny it. but they are.

The hottest topics that I see this activity in are :

Religion

Politics

The trend is that if, say, I don't agree with your pursuit of spirituality or your
political ideology, it isn't just a matter of " hey Dude, we really have different approaches here " ( smiley face , warm fuzzy feeling still intact )

Nope Daddy-o it becomes an "I'm right and you're wrong" match that occasionally will include name calling and almost always includes escalated voices.

I've seen some pretty sad results of said matches too.

This would be the place where I would normally interject that this is all part of the plan. The dream or the matrix if you will, that our friends in control and their henchmen (read folks at CNN and Fox News etc.) are attempting to weave to distract us from what may truly be important and what we truly may have control over.

But I'm not going to. Even though I think it's true.

Part of the reason I think this is such odd behavior is because I would think that any of these people would get the concept that you catch more flys with honey than vinegar. You know? It doesn't make sense to alienate someone whom you are supposedly wanting to move to your side. Do they think they're going to just "hate" the other guy into agreeing?

Or, even more annoying, this full of themselves 'I'm so intellectual ' types that adopt the patronizing attitude of , like , well what do you expect, he/she really isn't all that bright.
Peee- yuke!

BUT

If I say anything about this stuff in real life, then I become the object of all the nauseating attitudes out there. Swish, all eyes turn towards me along with all the associated poison and ridicule.
*sigh*

so I mostly don't say anything.
I decided to tap this out here because I feel safe and hardly anyone besides me reads it anyway!

There, I feel better now.